I got a gift today from my student, but I don't know what to think.
A month ago, I said hello in the hallway. "Hi Anna." "Hi Ms. Song." tells her friend under her breath, "She's my math teacher... She doesn't teach sh**." I whipped my head around, "That's rude!" and walked away. I didn't really know what else to say or do and she had never meant for me to hear those words. We hadn't had the best relationship. I felt like she was constantly disruptive and antagonistic and she felt like I explained things too quickly and my methods were ineffective. I had already asked her out in the hallway multiple times. I always smiled at her and said hello but it probably felt hollow. I secretly felt she hated me, and while that shouldn't really get to a teacher's psyche, I'll tell you- it does. The comment to her friend in the hall confirmed my fears. For a week or two, she was on eggshells around me. I had never brought up the comment that she made again; I never asked for resolution. And I was okay that she was uneasy because I wasn't really at a place to forgive. A week later, I made a conscious risk/choice to give her the role of group leader. At a magnet school, this was not just an honor but also a status symbol. She took it on imperfectly but with purpose and effort to the best of her ability. In her group, I've had interventions and also shown that I have faith in her capabilities. So she gave me a gift today, covered in tissue paper, wrapped with an old ribbon. It was a book. I thought it was a joke. She said, "this is for you." I said, "oh ok, huh." My initial reaction was that she had just wrapped up one of her English novels from school and gave it to me. So I waited a while, until after they started their test. I tentatively opened it. It was a journal. A really nice journal. Now, my guess is that her mom bought some gifts for teachers but I had assumed the worst. I wrote her a note thanking her for her thoughtful gift- I should have apologized my lackluster acceptance. It's a shielding mechanism. I didn't want to show genuine appreciation because I was afraid that this was some kind of prank. Another day that reminds me I have a lot to learn. Merry Christmas.
0 Comments
|
ms. eugooglesmathematics teacher Archives
September 2016
Categories
All
|